The Midwinter Songs (Kyle)

by Kyle MacKillop

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1.
God Please 03:42
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God bless my mother God save my father God find my brother Wherever he may be Help feed your children All sick and dying Answers their prayers And forget about me she spins and twirls in the mirror and dreams big plans under the spotlight I’ve melted wings before, soaring off the pine wood floor I’m making plans to never fall again So I lift my prayers to heaven he burns a candle in the graveyard and sings some songs he didn’t write I’ve shunned my family, threw them out like pulling teeth I so scared, I’ll end up one of them So I lift my prayers to heaven
2.
Lost Cosmonauts 04:12
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I left my home when I was boy told i could fight and could fly reading the maps of the heavens and stars shot out to space in the night oh how the sun burns hot like an iris but the vacuum outside is still cold its a one way flight flying on instruments searching for light where my home had been dressed all in white no wedding or funeral hopelessly lost in space hopelessly lost in space I was told my name had been written In granite and rock in the streets from high up above, my telescope on I was watching my name be erased oh outerspace can wrap you in blackness but its feels like you're floating at sea
3.
Watch them walk away 04:38
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I figure i am destined to be a beach town No one sticks around for a full year I see more license plates than headlights As quickly as they come they disappear There's a love that burns you raging from the inside I find a little every Friday night By Sunday i am standing in the ocean Watching what i thought was love walk outta sight I only watch them walk away Turns out There's nothing like a great escape I played it out, i played it out Just like a lonely renegade There's a part of me that only wants some silence Like ghost that hides some terrible truth The other half is rooting for adventure And they threaten me to tear us right in two That ghost hovering out over the water Watching snow falling white without a sound I am standing out in the ocean Wishing that my love would turn around
4.
Carrying Coffins 04:21
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The grass is greener where you want it to be You only feel stretch when you’re pulled at the seams You’ll find some dirt when you thought you were clean And when you’re digging in your closet do you think of me Walk in an open field realize where you’re gonna go Weave a blanket of gold for a bed of coal Now all we’re doing is Carrying coffins Passing ashes back and forth Carrying Heartache and headaches side by side till the day we die and planting all out love back in the earth There’s the wind that blows cold from the north When it changes direction you’ll be stuck on the shore There’s a candle being burned from both sides just like before A voice cries out from an alley, and brings an accord Walk in an open field realize where you’re gonna go Weave a blanket of love for a bed of coal
5.
The Desert 05:26
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the sun back then was cruel and unforgiving as it blazed its way across the open fields its scorched its fiery name upon my eyelids and with a wash of smoke my fate was sealed Memories are only what you make them They’re more easily lost than made The desert calls and I know I must answer as thoughts about my home slowly fade So where in Arizona are you headed anywhere in the desert will do You can drop me off, outside of the canyon where the painted earth kiss the sky of blue I’ve hitchhiked through rain and snow and sadness across a country that’s never known my name west towards the land that’s known for taking lives sure feet, head high, and open hands Dreams are just a mistress you cling to She’s ripped from you as you awake Every night I dream of painted deserts its a poison that I’m still willing to take (chorus) Don’t take my love from me the desert I must see
6.
Smoke Signals 03:52
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Ashes in the air look like Smoke… signals. Heaven meets earth where the mountains peak Hell has its jaws at the oceans deep We are too busy counting bills and counting sheep We aren't the bottom of the pile We’re just stuck between Count the trees down the road filling with crows Smell the smoke in the air and feel in your nose Something gonna give and probably will be the sea Covering the earth and drowning everything that sleeps You can feel the ash as it lands on your sleeve Never-mind, drive all night to watch the scene let your friends know you're coming from before your go Let it rise overhead and cut it just so
7.
Uncharmed & Uninspired 05:14
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I’ve just about worn a hole straight through this front porch while i’m sitting here while i’m sitting here I’ve watched a thousand sunsets burn into these hills Since i’m sitting here Since I’m sitting here I’ve spent as many days knowing where it goes but i still wish it’d stay i still wish it’d stay At night I fear All the silence here… I’m uncharmed and uninspired Trudging ‘round in a black & white I’ve got valium, laudanum, and whiskey to help me sleep through night But my days... are filled with troubles never ending I just want a happy ending To know it’ll be alright There’s a maddening silence That comes with being alone its a dangerous place its a dangerous place There’s always something happening in town Nothing stirs my Heart Not the way you did Not the way you did At night I fear All the silence here… Give some hope to hold on to Give me a ray of light Put my mind at ease Give me a taste of something good Give me a taste of love Give me taste of love
8.
Your Shadow 04:48
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balance is a virtue for the broken got so drunk you couldn’t speak carved a scar across this city wallowing in the havoc that you wreak I’m not afraid of the darkness or anything that it will hide somewhere a single gun goes off money says you’re on the trigger side gimme my space gimme my time leave your fear at the county line never mention a word of what you see Always in your shadow Always in your crosshairs buy steal beg or borrow you’re gonna burn this city down you’re gonna burn this city down this bar breeds a strange kind of family the wicked crazy company that you keep cast a line out into the darkness every time throw them back into the deep gimme my space gimme my time leave your fear at the county line never mention a word of what you see Always in your shadow Always in your cross-hairs buy steal beg or borrow you’re gonna burn this city down you’re gonna burn this city down save what you think you can move away from here leave this place before the sun sets or hold your ground and disappear
9.
Hotels 05:24
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4 hotels and highways 1 2 are keeping me far from you 6 Four million miles of roads 1 5 And you’re still my best view 1 I wanna wake up 2 4 5 and feel your hand in mine 4 like we used to... like we used to… 6 I’m not here much longer Tonight I’ll be further down the road buying postcards from rest stops I’ll mail’em when I get home I’m in need of love but I left to sing and play guitar its come to light this year that home really does follows the heart keep your head and your eyes up at least sleeping neath the same stars longing’ s a house you shouldn’t visit probably fall through the floor that which hides in the basement is much worse than before like a bus out there in the desert where you can see the city lights the part that’s hell is never ending always driving through the night
10.
Searching 04:29
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I use to save my baby teeth Wishing I wouldn’t grow old Use to hold on to newspaper scraps Remembering the lies I told I used to burn a candle in the window thinking it would bring luck in love almost burned down my apartment waiting for a sign from above Well I’m…. searching for love. Well I’m…. searching for love. I used to buy meals for two Hoping someone would be lonely Kept a journal for my dreaming only filled it with misery Somewhere out there someone is searching in the same way, for the same things Somewhere down the line is A heart that's needs a home that fits mine
11.
Going Down 03:59
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Out on the hunt for lust or love Betting the house that you'll hurt someone Cursing the stars, eating the sun We’re going down We’re going down with that ship at last hope is a shadow you’ll never cast filling your walls with trophies past Man, We’re going down In the beginning, we were taught we were taught, were were taught to be as hard a stone out on your own, you find out you find out, how well these hard things float you were the waves and sea eating away at the land i was the forest and trees that stared at the shore and the sand out in the forest, come and test come and test, come and test the timber of my heart out on the ocean, there are waves there are storms, you can drown or you can starve
12.
Dreaming 04:36
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You cut hair Like cutting yourself from the past Moved off to find a peace That just won't last There is a cloud that hangs over all that you see Pretending you hadn't choose wrong and how things would be I'm always dreaming of dancing And sirens piercing the night Keeping the sun from rising By pulling the covers tight Spending the evening holding on to things that you like Every day that you live ends with goodbye Wishing you could scream at the top of your lungs Listened to the sounds of the hills as you fell in love I'm always dreaming of walking And crying that pierces the night Keeping someone from leaving till Till i knew i said something right I'm always dreaming of leaving Like a traveler who leaves at first light Eating up miles of highway You're a star that was always so bright

credits

released November 26, 2013

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Kyle MacKillop, John Stoehr, and Jamion Williams Chattanooga, Tennessee

A songwriting project. Three local songwriters, twelve songs each, twenty-five days.

All songs are originals and were written and recorded in December 2013.

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